Where are you, Kyle?

I want to write about something a friend and I talked about today. It's so easy for us to question. I know many times in my life – the most difficult and trying times – I would ask, "God, where are you?" My friend said it's so easy for us to put the blame on someone else and I know that was true for me. Where are you, God? Easy, right? I've learned how backward that is. Each time I asked that question I imagine God was thinking something like, "Where are you, Kyle? I'm where I've always been and always will be, with you. You ignore me. Where are you?" A preacher I like wrote something about how it's so easy for us to get wrapped up in our own world that we get irritated or we flat-out ignore when God is calling or screaming at us. That was me. I was so quick to question God when I should have been questioning myself. How can I win a battle without God's help? How come I can be so prideful to think I can do things on my own, my way? How come I ignored Him for so long, straying from the path set before me? Why has it taken me so long to realize He is shaping me? I'm glad for the hard times now. I'm glad for the trials and struggles. I just wish I had focused on Him more. There will always be difficult times in my like, I know this. But that's no reason for me to abandon or blame God. That's when I need Him. That's when I should ask for his Help. I hope that not one day passes where I don't thank Him, praise Him, ask for His guidance, or listen when He calls on me.